Weight Loss

Well in almost 2 weeks I have lost almost 5 pounds. I'm very happy with this start. I am about the same as last time. 2.5 pounds a week. Hoping it stays on the same trend this time.

In the home news, little Aydan had R.S.V. She is on breathing treatments every 4 hrs until her chest clears up. Let me tell you, she hates them! She screams the entire time and tried to push the mask away. My poor baby. I feel so bad for her. Here is a picture of the one time she fell asleep during one. The doctor said it could take weeks maybe 2 months for it to clear all the way up.

She's doing a little bit better every day on the crying front. Some days are definitely worse then others. Of course the last week has been bad, but she has been sick so. And just to give yall an extra treat here is a pic of her in her first skirt outfit with tights. They were a little big but she just looked so cute in them!

Sickness

We knew it was inevitable but we have fallen sick. I have bronchitis and we are not sure what Aydan has. We will be taking her to the doctors today. She was coughing yesterday and now she is so hoarse. I feel so bad when she cries because she sounds so terrible. Hopefully she will get well soon.

Thank you for your kind words and support. The doctors think she has a case of colic. Shes getting a little better everyday and they think she might be starting to outgrow it. The only thing that seems to pacify her for any length of time it to be right up against you and your moving around. So we have been doing alot of baby wearing.

Also as a new year has started, so has hopefully a new me. Two years ago before we got pregnant with Shain, I went on a diet to lose weight. I lost almost 50 pounds in 7 months. When I got pregnant with him I gained 20 pounds in 16 weeks. Most of this came from being on bed rest almost the entire time and I could not exercise. After we lost him I gained 15 pounds. When we got pregnant again I gained a total of 16 pounds. Since having her I have added another 10. So I am not quite happy with my weight and its time to start to loose it. My goal is 50 by the end of summer.

Aydan wants to tell yall "Happy New Year"

An Update On Whats Been Going On

I have not forgotten you blogging world. I have not been in a very good spot the last few months and I did not want to put out all that negativity to you who read this. I didn't want to come off as ungrateful for my little one or anything like that. I love her so much but it has been a very rough 2 months. She smiles now but they are very far and few. When she is not happy and smiling she is crying. Non stop. And though she is doing better the last few days sometimes I feel as though I am not doing a good job of being a mother. That I am not doing something right. My honey tells me that I am and that this will pass and she will be much happier but i just don't see it yet. The light is too small at the end of the tunnel. But in my heart I know it will get better. So I am still here and I am keeping up with all of you. I will leave with some pictures of little Aydan.

A smiling Aydan at Christmas

Sleeping

Question 1

So 2 moms with a plan asked what was the best and worst thing about being a mother.

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I'll start with the worst first for me. I hate when she cries and nothing soothes her. When she cries and cries and nothing I do helps. It makes me feel like a terrible mother. That I am not doing something right. I know that this is ridicules to feel this way but it doesn't stop me. Luckily these long crying bouts are getting shorter and father between. And she is smiling a little now so that makes it better too.

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Teressa also thinks that this is the worst thing too. And I'm sure as she gets old it will continue to be the same. Things like thinking and I a good enough mother?, Am I providing the best life I can give her? and so on.

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The best thing for both of us is just having her, being privileged enough to be her mother. Knowing she is mine to have and hold and love. For a while I never thought I would get here. I was reaching the age I was told not to pass to have children. And then I got pregnant and then I lost him. So for me just having her is the best thing in the world. To one day in the future having her say mama, and I love you. For her to grasp my finger in her hand and smile at me. It just melts my heart. To look at me with her big eyes and just trust me.

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Here is one picture, the rest have to wait till I can edit some of them.

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No Takers?

No takers on my free for all question answering? Oh come on, I know there has got to be something someone wants to know. I get my pictures tomorrow so I should be able to post them up tomorrow or Wednesday. My boss said that they turned out really good. Other then that now much else but working and working and then spending time with my baby. I can't believe she is already 7 weeks old. Shes almost 3 months how crazy is that. Which means in about 2 weeks Ill do another set of pics here at my house. I'm' trying to learn to take better pictures. We shall see if she cooperates for us.

Sunday

Today we were so busy and now I'm exhausted. We went to church this morning and then had to run a whole bunch of errands. We are just now getting home. I really dont know if I'll be able to keep up this posting everyday thing. There are just not enough hours in the day. I hope everyone had a good weekend.

Smiles

So the last couple of days our little one has started to smile at us. Not very often but they are definitely smiles. Every time she gives me one my heart melts. I love it. I can spend hours just watching her. Her eyes are starting to focus more on us now and she just looks and looks. You can tell she is actually looking at you and not through you. Everyday I just marvel that I have her.

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We did get some pictures done with her dress but I wont have them til Monday or Tuesday to put them up. She did very good and we were able to get a good 20 minutes without her paci but for the rest 30 mins she has it in her mouth. I think some of them will come out very good.

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I'm putting this out there to everyone. Sometimes I don't have much to say so in order to get through posting everyday I would like to answer questions from ya'll. I did this way back in January during a tww and there were some really good questions. SO whatever you got, give it to me. I'm pretty open and will talk about most everything.

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And just because I can, here is anouther pic of little Aydan

Not Much

Sorry not much going on over here. Sick baby and a sick mommy. Nothing serious but we both have a slight head cold. We are going to try and get pictures of her in her christening outfit for her christening/blessing ceremony at out church next month. We'll see if she feels up to it. I can tell I'm back at work at the day care because for the last 4 months I have not been sick. Now I go back and a week after I'm sick.

At work we have gotten our first case of N1.H1. WE had to totally disinfect our entire center with bleach water. Normally we bleach before we go home. But toys that were not played with we did not have to. Today everything was done. Hopefully we have no more cases but I think we will this season.

Fall Pictures Take Two

Here is the second take on her fall picts that i did. she was not very happy on this day but I did manage to get some cute pics in. sorry not a longer post. my sick little one did not sleep well last night.

Doctor's Visit

Thanks Jilliebean for your great advice. We do own the book but we have not watched the dvd, i will have to look at the library. We put gas drops in all her bottles and we swaddle her because it is the only way she will sleep. We will just keep trying and doing different things, seeing what helps.

Tomorrow she goes for her first sick doctor's visit. She has been congested for the last 2 weeks and it's not getting any better. In fact she now sounds worse and shes not eating very well. We have had to give her pedi.lite the last couple of days because she just is not eating the formula. At least we are getting some fluids in her. I'm leaving this post with a picture of her in her costume again.